Jealousy – Life’s Natural Motivator

Turn your obstacles into excuses. Then, stop making excuses.

I was having a conversation with a colleague recently and the discussion turned to priorities. I’m the kind of person that firmly believes you get out what you put in. If you want something, make it happen. Turn your obstacles into excuses and then stop making excuses.

As a kid, my sun rose and set around horses. I loved being outside with the horses. In that respect, not much has changed. My parents get all the credit for using my love and passion for my horse to guide me into a responsible, driven adult. I don’t ever remember having a chore list or chart.. but I do remember being punished if I forgot to feed or water the horses.

I also remember being threatened with missing the rodeo on the weekend if I didn’t get on my horse at least 3 days during the week… this was all fine and dandy until I turned 16 and got a job. Then I needed to find new and innovative ways to get my horses rode while juggling a job. My solution: get up at 4:30 and ride in the dark before school. It was brilliant! My mom wasn’t impressed with my plan. She was even less impressed when I followed through. But hey, I never missed a rodeo!

Now, I’m a hard worker. To a fault actually. When I’m passionate about something, I will work myself into exhaustion. As I get older, I’m learning how to schedule better and prioritize. But I’m still the kind of person who feels a great deal of guilt if I don’t get done in a day what I have programmed in my mind I need to… such as getting my horses rode. This is probably part of what makes me a shoe in for a training business. I’m too hard on myself to screw anyone over with taking their money for not getting the job done. The trade off to being a hard worker is what I just outlined above. I don’t allow myself to rest. Even when I am resting, my mind is focused on what I should, could, or will be doing later on.

I get asked a lot “how do you find time to ride so much when you work a full time job? Aren’t you exhausted?” The answer is simple; there’s no other option. I don’t look at it as exhausting or something extra. It’s never been an option. It’s always just been what I do.

So, getting to the point I wanted to make with this post. I have always felt it is human nature to have feelings of jealousy or simply a longing for what others have. It’s how we express or handle that jealousy that turns it into a negative word. I have lots of friends that I’m jealous of for various reason. Notice how I said friends… I tell them I’m jealous all the time. For example, a great friend of mine put up her own indoor arena a few years back. I told her I’m crazy jealous. Because I am. We laugh and joke about it still…. because there are things I have that she wishes she had too.

Ironically, jealousy can be one hell of a motivator! When my ego tries to convince me that I’m jealous of someone in a negative way, I remind her of all the great things I have going… and once in a while I’ll tuck it into the back of my crown to work towards. If we stop wondering how someone achieves something and start working towards having it too… what a wonderful world we would live in!!

A friend, and client of mine sent me this meme a little bit ago and said that it made her think of me. It really resonated because it’s true. I do get complimented all the time on my drive and the great job I do on client horses and running my business and on my own horses. I get told even more that people wish they had my drive and passion. Now, I’m not saying that I don’t love what I do or that I would trade places with anyone to get out of being me. I love me. I love my passion and drive. But I can, 110% say that it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. I love my crown. I love having 4 million things to do and being under pressure to do them. That’s just how I operate. Always have, always will. BUT, there’s no denying that my crown is heavy. As I stated above, I work myself into exhaustion. I don’t get ‘me’ time… at least not until the school year is over. I can’t actually remember the last time I had dinner before 9pm or got to sleep past 7am (and THAT is sleeping in!).

There are people I look at and wish I had what they have too. I’m no different than you 😉 I’d love to make the NFR one day. Ultimate goal. I think it is for most barrel racers. But, I also realize that that road isn’t always smooth and paved. Those girls spend more time on the road than they do at home. They have weeks of no cheques and empty bank accounts. They have injured and tired horses pop up at the most inconvenient times. They have struggles. Their crowns are heavy. I’m not going to say heavier than mine or yours… but definitely different.

The biggest similarity between everyone else and me… and you too, is that we all have passions. We all put our energy where we desire it to be. Think about that the next time you watch someone work a full time job and then ride 6 head and wonder how they do it 😉 On top of that… put jealous into your positive word bank. It’s ok to be jealous. But own it, recognize it, use it as motivation and know that someone is jealous of you too!

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